STEP 1: DETERMINE IF YOU’RE REALLY PREGNANT
Before you start planning all the different ways to break the news of your pregnancy, you should make sure you’re really pregnant. At LifeNet, we offer some free services that can help you know for sure if you’re expecting.
First, you can come to the center for a free, confidential, and highly accurate pregnancy test. It may come as a surprise, but many women take pregnancy tests incorrectly and get inaccurate results.
STEP 2: CONSIDER YOUR OWN FEELINGS
If your pregnancy test comes back positive, it can be tempting to rush to your partner for support. However, we recommend considering your own feelings first, before you tell anyone else.
One of the best ways to come to terms with your own thoughts is to write them down on paper. When you write something down, your mind has to slow down and think about each word. Your thoughts don’t get a chance to “run away,” and it’s easier to keep track of all the feelings in your head and heart. This is a good way to consider and process all your feelings and ideas.
STEP 3: UNDERSTAND YOUR OPTIONS
Finally, it’s important that you understand all of your options early on in the process. Many women have misconceptions about the different pregnancy options available. That’s why it’s important to get the truth about every option before you make any decisions you can’t take back.
At LifeNet, we offer free information and education about all your pregnancy options. There is no cost to sit down with one of our volunteers and talk through all of your pregnancy options in a safe, comfortable, and confidential setting.
STEP 4: TELL YOUR PARTNER
Once you have the information you need and you’ve taken the time to sort out how you feel, you need to tell your partner. We recommend giving the news in a comfortable and familiar setting, such as at home or another private space. Don’t bring it up when you’re out in public, like at a restaurant or cafe. This can make the situation more uncomfortable for both of you.
When you tell your partner, make sure you’re open and honest about your own feelings and plans. Don’t try to hide your own thoughts or emotions. However, you should also expect them to need some time to process the news as well. They might be confused, angry, scared, or even excited. Give them time to work through their own thoughts and feelings before you ask how they want to proceed.
It’s also important in this stage to be a good listener, and to allow them to be open with you. In many cases the partner feels differently about pregnancy than the girlfriend does. This is natural, and you will need to work through these differences together.
ADDITIONAL PREGNANCY HELP
Of course, telling your partner that you’re pregnant is only the first step of your journey. You will need to make many more decisions in the coming weeks and months. If you need help with these choices or you’re not sure where to turn, LifeNet is here for you. We offer free help, education, and support for all women and couples facing unplanned pregnancies. We even offer special services for men to help partners decide on their own role in your pregnancy.
For more information, call LifeNet today at 530.727.9888. You can also walk in to our center any time or schedule an appointment.